Wild and Faithful Heart

Lately I have been feeding my Faith , to ultimately end up going back to church once more. While I was away I always kept my faith near me . I prayed but not as much as I would , I would pray for the normal , pray that things would get better . Pray that my relationship would get better or somehow he would turn to god. But still , I had doubts because I was not fully going after my faith. I would have doubts sometimes if there was a god or if he was truly listing to me. After my relationship ended , I got thrown into another dark place that I thought I would never find myself again in. But I was I had doubts and I was turning away from him because I believed that it was all his fault. I needed someone to blame and it was god . Why was he making me feel this way? why was I stuck again in this rut? Why was I thrown aside again? After awhile , give or take a month I began to have peace again . I stopped listing to pop music ( still listen but only during the day). While I slept I turne

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It has been brought to my attention , that I may be too stuck on the past. That I have been blasting my Ex and have been childish in most words. Here and now I am going to clear the air in my own way. I know the relationship is over I know that more than likely . He has moved on and wont be back and I need to move on with my life. I get that , and I know that I need to move on. Ive moved on , but Im griving in my own way, by talking about it. I had three years worth of my life devoted to my relationship something that was going to be more than. A relationship , that I so badly wanted to turn into marriage. And it was heading that way , but everything changed. And my life changed , no one knows what was said that night and it will stay that way. I may have those times where I hate him , im sitting there bitter and angry. And upset that it hurts , and thats when it comes down to it. Im HURT , break ups are horrible and Im going through one. People process things in their own way , somet

Ive been at this for a few months now I started in Feb, now its april. I have come to terms finally that I can see results from all the hard work and dedication no matter how hard it seems most days. Last night I got giddy and bought two motivation tanks to add to my growing wardrobe of workout clothing. And cannot wait to wear them to the gym, I believe its finally sinking in that I have lost weight and gained more muscle ... well some muscle. I use to weigh in at 224-225 now I weigh about 220 which is a wonderful five pounds lost! Sure it isnt much and a lot of people would give up after all this time and have only lost five pounds but I want to keep going I want to lose this weight. Next summner not this one.. ( I still got work to do!) . I want to go to my favorite store and slip on a two piece I would not have the courage to wear while being my past weight and be able to smile and be proud to wear it. This isnt a long post but I just thought I would share :)

If you follow me on my review blog you get tons of review of weight loss products. And me endorsing them they are real endorsements. I thought I would touch face on here about my weight loss journey that I have started. I was always one of those yo-yo dieters and that one person who always started eating healthy but then failed. Breaking up , or rather taking a break from my relationship ive taken a long hard look at myself. I know I am not the hottest girl out there nor the prettiest or the skinniest to tell you the truth. I know I need to lose weight , without sugar coating it. I look at all these beautiful clothing and I want to wear them . I want to feel comfortable in my skin and want to feel loved for who I am in the skin I am in. Even though I felt loved I did not feel truly loved because that sad part of me was feeling like it was pity love. That my significant other was only in love with me , because he pitted me because no one else did . Looking back on it now , that is a